Giving Grace: Stress Strategies

February has been INSANE for us. We knew this going into this month. We also know that the first part of March is more of the same. Until Sunday, we were doing well. We were tag-teaming. We were giving each other space for downtime. We were connecting on emotional and spiritual levels, even though we often weren't in physical proximity with each other. Our wheels were spinning at the same speed.

Sunday morning came. We were both exhausted. I had driven two hours away to speak at a retreat on Friday night and then drove back to town on Saturday morning to be at an all-day dance competition for our oldest. The adrenaline alone from speaking and then being a dance mom was enough to shut me down. Add in chores that had been neglected and I was over the edge. Unfortunately, so was Craig. And so the downward spiral of sarcasm and snippiness began. It took two efforts to try to regain our traction, but thankfully we did. Here's how (email subscribers, click here):

It's so easy when we are stressed to become completely self-focused. But part of being a team means continually keeping part of our focus on the needs of our spouse. If we can take a step back from our own self-involvement, we can see how helping our spouse also helps us. When I posted this video on Facebook, one of my friends commented:

I've heard that when couples go to counseling the #1 problem is self-focus: overly focusing on their own needs and can't see their spouse's.

The good news? It's not just us that falls into this trap. The bad news? Satan knows he has an in with this kind of thing:

  • If he can keep us so busy and distracted that we can't connect.
  • If he can trains our eyes to focus on what our spouse is not doing instead of what he/she is.
  • If he can tempt us to keep scales of everything.
  • If he can breed bitterness.
  • If he can blind us with our own needs so we can't see those of our spouse.

Be aware of how easily the enemy can drive a wedge between you. Push through the busyness to find each other again. Ask God to help you both get your wheels spinning at the same speed and in the same direction again. All things are possible with God.