The Necessity of Undoing

The Necessity of Undoing

I'm guest posting today over at a friend's place. Here's a little teaser with a link at the end where you can finish reading.

This has been a summer worthy of its own hashtag.

If I had the time or the desire, I’d go back through each sad event between May 8th and the day I posted about Irma’s projected path (because at press time, she hasn’t made it to the U.S.) and tag it #thesummerfromhellcontinues.

As I talked to my mentor via FaceTime today, she said, “You have been through trauma.”

I bristled.

Trauma? It's not trauma. Trauma is what people are experiencing after Harvey. Trauma is sexual abuse or the loss of a child. This is not trauma, I thought to myself.

And this attitude of mine comes a few days after talking to two different women about two different things and me telling them that God wants them to know their pain is valid. Their wounds are valid. It is okay, I said, for them to lament and cry and point to all the broken pieces and be sad. I actually, this morning, told one of them to not compare her wounds with someone else’s.

Therefore, I know what I am telling myself is not the truth. Is it not easy to speak the truth and then shut one’s own ears?

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Recognizing Your Spouse's Tells (new video)

Recognizing Your Spouse's Tells (new video)

Ever play poker? Play enough with the same people and your get really good at reading their tells. Same in marriage. You know someone well enough and you learn when your spouse isn't ok...despite what he/she may say. 

Last week, my grandmother died and we spent the weekend with Craig's parents. His mom is very ill and though it was an amazing visit, I left so sad. But it took Craig awhile to get me to admit it-for a variety of reasons. 

In this video, we talk about the importance of recognizing your spouse's tells and why it's beneficial to continue to pursue him/her through the denial.

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