The Necessity of Undoing

The Necessity of Undoing

I'm guest posting today over at a friend's place. Here's a little teaser with a link at the end where you can finish reading.

This has been a summer worthy of its own hashtag.

If I had the time or the desire, I’d go back through each sad event between May 8th and the day I posted about Irma’s projected path (because at press time, she hasn’t made it to the U.S.) and tag it #thesummerfromhellcontinues.

As I talked to my mentor via FaceTime today, she said, “You have been through trauma.”

I bristled.

Trauma? It's not trauma. Trauma is what people are experiencing after Harvey. Trauma is sexual abuse or the loss of a child. This is not trauma, I thought to myself.

And this attitude of mine comes a few days after talking to two different women about two different things and me telling them that God wants them to know their pain is valid. Their wounds are valid. It is okay, I said, for them to lament and cry and point to all the broken pieces and be sad. I actually, this morning, told one of them to not compare her wounds with someone else’s.

Therefore, I know what I am telling myself is not the truth. Is it not easy to speak the truth and then shut one’s own ears?

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On Being a Rescuer

On Being a Rescuer

Today, my Facebook feed has been filled with images of ordinary people using ordinary boats to save ordinary people in an extraordinary situation. The catastrophe named Harvey has wrecked Houston and surrounding areas in the most unbelievable way. My father-in-law has been stuck in the hospital where he works as a chaplain (hopefully he's being rescued as I type), some of my friends have been evacuated, and I frequently check on my other friends to see if they've survived another night in a flood-threatening situation.

It's all terrible. 

But the rescuers. Praise God both for the people in uniform and the plain-clothes who are continually risking their lives to save people in danger of drowning and dying and despairing.

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Giving Grace: When Your Spouse has Anxiety

Email subscribers click here to see our video about dealing with anxiety in your marriage.

Not sure if you suffer from situational anxiety or if you have generalized anxiety disorder (GAD)? Click here for info.

We wanted to provide you with some questions you and your spouse can discuss as you navigate together to health and learn how to manage anxiety. There is a "conversation starter" question for each of the strategies we've given in the video.

Question 1: What are some of the things that trigger your anxiety?

(Note: Sometimes anxiety seems to come on even when things seem calm. If this happens to you, be sure to let your partner know. Anxiety often lurks in our subconscious and rears it's head when we least expect it. It can be hard to explain why it's happening in the moment and we have a hard time making sense of it.)

If you'd like some more info on the difference between triggers and causes, I found a short article here.

Question 2: When you're experiencing anxiety, what are some of the ways your spouse can comfort you?

Helpful resources here , here and here.

Question 3: How have you seen growth in your emotional well-being? What further steps do you feel like you may need to take? What steps does your spouse see might be beneficial?

Prayer is always powerful. Here's a prayer card you can pray for yourself and for your spouse.